Thursday 12 December 2013

Define.

The trouble with defining is trying to define...

As Devine;
I define
Your presence in my life.

You are by me.
Everywhere,
Even when I'm not there.

In the darkness,
in the light,
when I think of you at night.

You are here
So I say don't let fear
Make you disappear.

Because you are defined-
As the one I'm
Trying to find.


Monday 2 December 2013

Hang on a sec...

Waiting patiently
forever
for Ever.
Ever never comes
and they say
never say never.
Never say Ever
feels like forever,
ever.
Cz Ever's  
never gonna come;
Unless you wait forever.

Monday 7 October 2013

Twinkle Twinkle little spark.

Someone who holds my hand,

who cares enough to check on me,

who understands my weirdness,

who shares my fears,

who excites my heart beat,

and I excite his.

Wednesday 4 September 2013

Six Words, To Express, My feelings.

I,
And he,
Was the one.

                                   We dance
                                   On each other's
                                   Heartbeat
 
With you
In heaven
24/7        

She cried
While facing
Her fears.
 
She loved,
But never told,
Him
 
 
Her eyes glistened
At his thought.
 
 
Single
In a bed
For two
 
He had manipulated her
With verses.
 
They liked
The games
They played

She waited,
For him
To arrive.
Make up
and
Wake up
Together
 
 
 
Ready
To teach
And
To Learn.
 
 
 
Continued...
 
 
 
 
He waited patiently
For her love.
 
He watched her fall
In traps.
 
It hurt
To see her suffering.
 
She realised
She was hurting him.
 
They both knew
What remained untold.
 
 





Tuesday 27 August 2013

Carelessly walking down Ego Lane




 












I was carelessly walking down Ego Lane,
Wondering why I'm not called Elaine,
When I heard something coming from down the road drain.

It was sudden and brutal and loud to my ear,
I had never considered a monster lived here,
So I instantly begged it would just disappear.

The clouds hid the sun
While my legs tried to run.
'Please, oh please disappear,
You monster called Fear!'

Blood rushed through my vein-
I tried to fight but in vain.
This monster grew stronger
As I just let it conquer.

I could hear its voice say
'You have no choice today'
All I wanted was to beat it
And to finally defeat it.

I stood up now straight and strong,
Proved to the monster it was wrong.
I looked around and far ahead
To realise this all was in my head.





Friday 16 August 2013

A Light note

















The hardest part is when nobody else can see in you what you can see in yourself.
If you don't show it, it will never be exposed.
It will never be exposed. Will it...

Tuesday 2 July 2013

Sailing Turmoil

you see
the sea
reflects the light
from the sky
to my eye
and the sun and moon
play
with the sea
inside me






P.S.: Background music; Lila Downs Una Sangre (One Blood) highly relevant, darkest light :]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OLh982yYgg






'Everything is connected'
'Day and Night'


Friday 28 June 2013

That kind of love. The Kind Love.

Thought I'd go to the bakery and call my mum for a chat. We ended up talking for 40 minutes and at some point she said 'follow your heart'. I was surprised by her advice. It was on point.

I was sat outside the bakery on a wall and a cat approached me. I think she could sense I was lonely. My voice cracked at some point.

It was when I started mentioning [insert name here].I thought I'd pet the cat. Besides,it looked like it needed love and affection.

As soon as his guard was down, he surrendered. The cat, I mean.

He crawled on my lap, sat there, receiving all the care I had to give. So effortlessly loving. Like we'd known each other for years.

And I thought to myself, this is the kind of love I'm looking for. The Kind Love.










.

Thursday 27 June 2013

Ten odd residents.

Picture this, a group of apartments facing the middle (the pool) and its ten odd residents. 
And then me.

One's an English lady who reads books and drinks wine, 
        the other's a father of unknown identity (Bulgarian?) with his two children,
   then me,
then a curious Cypriot old couple whose female member watched me eat on the balcony
                                and further away a Cypriot nan with her granddaughter.

They look at me with suspicion each time I'm on the balcony, on the rare occasions. 
Who is this young lady and what is she doing here alone?
Has she got no friends?
No family?

Relax my beloved, I come here in peace.

I have both friends and family. But I have abandoned them for the sake of my sanity. I am an intuitive empath, you see.

I needed my time and space to recollect my thoughts. To regain my energy and to stay focused on the cause. My dissertation, that is.

But it seems to me that, just like Homer's Ithaca, the journey will give me more than what the cause will.

Tuesday 25 June 2013

The chair

Alone in an apartment between apartments. Pitch black apart from this balcony. Shadows are formed by light from the inside and darkness from the outside. In the naturally occurring silence I can hear my thoughts remembering the times when darkness hid the light; the days when I trusted doubt.

A dog barks. But I am not scared of a known danger. I am scared of an unknown. I want to know. If I know I won't be scared. If I knew I wouldn't have been scared. You should have told me. You should have told me your truth. 

Silence, music and thoughts feel the space with sound waves. I wonder if my heart's vibrations reach yours. I doubt it, for you are far. For you are in the past. For you are far in the past. And I wonder if you were ever as close as I felt you to be. Inside, the light is bright; it assures me you were. Outside, its absence is dark, like yours. 

I am the chair on the balcony. 
Embraced by both logic and intuition I wait for the morning where the truth will shine and I will know closure. 

Monday 17 June 2013

A published journey of thoughts

Friday 24 May 2013

'Forgotten Dreams'

I'm listening to fall-in-love music and I wonder if I ever fell in love...

Actually, I have fallen in love, but have I ever loved?

If I had I'd known, wouldn't I?

Sometimes I feel so intensely for some people. An explosion; the butterflies...
and I wonder if that's what it is- and whether I will have the chance to experience it fully.

Monday 20 May 2013

The Result

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-p5vvkNGK4  

(Don't give up until you see the result)]




Rocking back and forth on the beat of a song, hoping my heartbeat is as synchronised as this melody-
while my eyes water.

My eyes water
in the realisation 
I've made it through.

I've made it through
the good and
the bad.

The bad
that was
cruel to my heart.

Cruel to my heart
and inconsiderate of
love.

Love
which was used and
abused.

Abused
by those who could not
live up.

Live up
to the greatness of
a challenge.

A challenge
whose only test is
its journey.

Its journey
which makes you want to 
give up.

Give up
and think your efforts were 
wasted.

Wasted
for not giving you enough in 
return.

Return 
to innocence and see
the light.

The light
that can only be seen at 
the end.

The end




Friday 3 May 2013

Turning Tables

You've been tripping between what you have
what you want
and what you could have.
The three could co-exist with efforts and mutality
but the promising thought
guarantees the latter two.
However, the risk of losing what you have
which could,
potentially,
be combined with what you want and
what you could have
is tricky.
So do you go for what you want,
or make what you have be what
you could have?



Cz we only play 'all in' when we've
got nothing to win.



Thursday 18 April 2013

Is this life?

Instead of holding hands,
we're holding drinks.
Instead of looking to the eyes,
we look at screens.

Anomie
is troubling me.
Anomie,
what will it be?

When the great dream
that you deem
to be true and real
fails you
and you collapse
thinking life is but
surreal.

When you're so close
but so far
to being happy
and content
without having to pretend
that you're alright.

When you can't accept
your loving image
through others' eyes-
you deny beauty
and love
like the advert of Dove.

When you know
your intuition says go
but you stop to think
about your dream
that you deem-
meanwhile stolen by someone
who sleeps better at night.

Monday 8 April 2013

Renaissance Hearts

I'm honestly not feeling
these interactions.
Tired and not bothered 
to perceive their actions

Thinking why should I bother?
Or how should I do?
Then thinking 'go with the flow'
and your thoughts shall too.

Over-thinking situations
and life itself; over-thought
Trapped in troubled thinking
when they thought you won't

Why do people feel this way,
and why don't they talk?
If you like me tell me
if you don't, just walk

What are your expectations,
or do you not have any?
Let's become renaissance hearts
and not just two of many.

Friday 15 March 2013

Positive vibration yeah: reflective quotation

I take the time
to give
to help
to care
for others.
 
I take more time
to think
to dream
to worry
for others
 
I take some time
to joke
to play
to get
to others.
 
But I take no time
to give
to help
to care
to think
to dream
to worry
to joke
to play
to get
to myself.

Thursday 7 February 2013

Narration:

She returns to the desk. The drop-in desk; available for students who are seeking employability advice. It's not that busy today so she checks her emails. Wonders whether she'll get her essay done in time- so- by tomorrow morning.

She doubts it but it looks like a challenge she would like to overcome. Otherwise, she'll just give it in on Monday. No biggie... Besides, the lecturers said, 'nobody ever fails the masters degree'. She wonders if she'll be the exception... again.

Suddenly, she thinks of her dear friend Serg and remembers he hasn't replied to yesterday's email. APANAGIA MOU, EPEXANEN ALOPOS, she thinks to herself. And then decides to compose an email for him, hoping he's still alive and lively; as he would be if he ever won a game of Scrabble against me.

*against her.

Saturday 19 January 2013

Ifff

If you can hold your breath
for more than one minute

If you can swim
to the deep and back

If you can sing
using one syllable

If you can get drunk
by having juice

If you can accept
more than you deny

Yours will be the love
my child 


Sunday 13 January 2013

When was the last time?


Thoughts here-> Random happiness that hits you at 00:53 on your way home, walking in the cold

Roads are empty all the better for the groovy walk

'He said to be careful of thieves in the night'

Step-jump, step. Double step, jump. Right. Hands, butterflies- rainbows, step, trips, ouch, continues

I look around, nobody's watching and I smile to the rain wishing he won't tell. Wishing others were there sharing the joy that hit me while this song came on the radio.Its beat and rhythm reminded me of the time I used to listen to it and perform ninja techniques as part of my contemporary dance.

When was the last time you wore a funky, groovy print as part of your 'normal' outfit?

When was the last time you went on a trampoline?

When was the last time you laughed so hard you couldn't hear others' laughters?

When was the last time you missed someone you've just said goodbye to?

When was the last time you pulled and pushed someone to show your excitement?

When was the last time you felt your soul jumping up and down around while your body followed?

It's been a while!